Email or Plain Joe?

I was astonished to find BNET.com’s post that people worldwide would choose their email over coffee. According to a survey by IncrediMail, 73.8% of respondents feel email is essential to their lives. As a woman, I can barely relate to the 54.4% who would give up chocolate for email. Then again, those 54.4% of respondents must not be premenstrual.

As a dedicated Plain Joe coffee addict, it sickened me to find that 50.2% would give up coffee for email.

Email is a standard communication tool. We still should not have to choose one or the other in order to communicate with the society. Most of us should not be allowed to communicate without a good strong cup of Plain Joe coffee. A true Plain Joe coffee drinker couldn’t start her computer without Plain Joe.

Meeting at a local coffee house may be replaced by chatting online. Thanks to Facebook and AIM, Plain Joe coffee drinkers can enjoy their cup of joe and connect online. Plain Joe coffee even has it’s own Facebook account for fans to connect together. No one should choose between electronic communication and coffee. I opt to grab my cup of Plain Joe first and chat away to my fellow Plain Joe Facebook fans. Caffeinated conversation is the only way to go.

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Cupping…Coffee?

The delicate art of “cupping” has been around for centuries.  The art of cupping is practiced by male and female.

The art of cupping is a coffee fanatic making passionate love to their Plain Joe Coffee.  Coffee cupping is detailed at Coffeeresearch.org.  Cupping is descriped as the ideal tasting techinique by Plain Joe Coffee lovers.  A Plain Joe cupper will utilize intense cupping to evaluate the aroma and taste.

Proper Plain Joe cupping requires proper table set up.  When cupping Plain Joe coffee, set up a quiet and calm area containing 6 to 10 cups.  All the Plain Joes should be freshly brewed and ready for consumption.  Keep a glass of water available for cleansing the pallet between cuppings.

Official Plain Joe Cupping Steps:

1. Smell the Plain Joe coffee grounds.  Observe the fragrance.
2. Brew the Plain Joe.  Take a deep whiff of the fresh coffee.  Observe Joe’s aroma.
3. Fill a spoon with Plain Joe.  Slurp Plain Joe strongly to cover your entire tongue.  Swallow.  No spitting allowed. Observe intensity, acidity, aftertaste, and body.
4. Continue the steps as your finish cupping all the Plain Joe coffee. Successful cupping of your Plain Joe coffee takes pratice and patience.

To be the best cupper, a person only need to be eager to learn and regular practice.  Our suggestion:  Keep your cupping practice light and fun.  Share your Plain Joe Cupping, just be careful who you cup with.

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Get Laid Off and Take Your Plain Joe With!

In a recent article written by Kate Lorenz, posted by MSN.com, covered the Six Ways to Prepare For a Layoff.

Here at Plain Joe, we want to give you the six essential steps to get out of there and still take your Plain Joe with you!

Six ways to leave with your Joe:

1. Get Your Plain Joe Gear Organized.
Start by cleaning out your Plain Joe mug everyday. You don’t want to be presented with a pink slip and have to worry about spilling day-old coffee on your shit. At the same time, start packing up important personal items. Performance reports, copies of projects you and Plain Joe worked on.

2. Drink all the Plain Joe You Can.
Drink up and take any pain to the docs. Don’t worry about complications of Plain Joe and your acid reflux, stains on your teeth, or high blood pressure. Drink up now, and have the doc fill your medications before loosing benefits.

3. Network With Plain Joe.
Clearly, after the lay-off you’ll need to find another source of income. Start schmoozing up to fellow co-workers, clients, and friends by sharing Plain Joe with them. Our suggestion; order a gift pack with two Plain Joe mugs and whole ground beans.

4. The Hunt Is On!
In addition to updating your resume and keeping it clean of Plain Joe spills. Start searching the web for new job opportunities on sites like narms.com.

5. Get Caffeinated Up!
Anyone who’s been laid off can tell you that the day it happened they got that “vibe” from the office. Prepare yourself. Grab an enormous cup of Plain Joe, making sure it is steaming hot. Start chugging to get your heart rate up. In the event the HR people feed you lines of bull, keep your cup full so you can chuck Plain Joe at them. Always, stop and sip on your joe before signing any paperwork or agreements. You’ll need the time to fully asses your options and a cup of Plain Joe will provide that.

6. Plain Joe’s Exit Strategy.
After you’ve been canned, the single most important exit strategy will be grabbing all your Plain Joe beans. Don’t leave those jerks with a premium brew like Plain Joe. Instead switch it out with one of the other guys, like Folgers Decaf. They’ll miss you in the end!

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Hey Momma, Use Those Grounds!

Hey moms, don’t throw out those used coffee bean yet!  Here’s some alternative uses for after those beans have brewed your morning Joe.

Playsand for the kiddies. Let your used coffee grounds dry.  Afterwards, put them in a bucket for the kids to play with. The grounds act as playsand, but a heck of alot easier to clean up!

Fight Cellulite.  Say goodbye to those expensive cellulite creams, and hello to joe!  Grind your coffee beans very fine and mix with body lotion or oil.  Rub onto the cellulite areas and wrap in saran wrap for a few moments.  Get some kicken thighs in a 3x a week plain joe treatment!

Now go make yourself a strong cup of Plain Joe, and this time, save those grounds!

 

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Plain Joe Diet?

In the midst of America’s calorie conscious menus and lifestyles, our lattes have gone skinny.   Companies like Starbucks couldn’t keep it a secret long about the high calorie and fat content in their frou-frou drinks galore.  To combat the midst of health conscious Subway dieters, Starbucks and other major coffee chains introduced their “skinny” drinks.

Though Starbucks claims their new dieter’s delights are not targeted solely to woman, I am not sure how many men are ordering up a “Skinny Latte” on regular basis.  So what’s the damage then if a man orders up his grande latte from the coffee giant?  A whopping 272 calories and 14 grams of fat!

How about the popular Plain Joe Coffee brand?  A Plain Joe in the morning will only cost you 5 calories and zero grams of fat.  Now only wish we could see those types of savings at the gas pump!

Let’s take this Plain Joe coffee diet a little further.  One should replace their morning $3.00 latte with a $1.00 Plain Joe, and add in some recreational activity to achieve satisfactory weight loss. Just a little nibbling during sex would shave off five cups of Plain Joe.

What’s America waiting for?  Save your pocket book and your waist line by making every morning a Plain Joe morning!

 

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Meow Coffee

In today’s coffee world, there are many fine roasters’ to deliver gourmet coffee of choice. At $450 a pound, Indonesian Kopi Luwak is the most gourmet roast one will find in the South Pacific.  To top it off, you won’t find these beans on a farm, but straight from the cats’ rear end.  These beans are excreted from native civet cats, as reported by Reuters in 2007.

What makes these beans so hot?  Maybe it’s the delicate art of extracting each bean by hand from the cat’s poo in the forest.  Somehow I doubt the revenue from an each $50 cup of kitty coffee is passed onto the extractor’s hands for their hard work.

Either way, in order to you to taste the delectable and sweet roasted kitty coffee, you’ll need to hit up the down under of Australia.  Though the wild cats are considered a special snack treat for the Chinese, this gourmet roast hasn’t quite hit the shelves of your local Kroger’s yet.

For those jumping at the chance to get their taste buds a dribble of Kopi Luwak, keep your eyes out because the consumption of the coffee has grown considerable.  For Australian’s, the coffee has been the center of the expanding gourmet coffee scene which has steadily grown over the years. In 2007, it was reported that Kopi Luwak had reached $2.5 billion dollars in sales in Australia alone.

Now that’s the cat’s meow!

 

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